Sunday, August 26, 2007
Guess the Plot
1. It's not easy having a mother who's such an obsessive Monkees fan she names her children after Monkees song titles, especially when your older sisters, Valleri and Mary Mary, used up the only normal names in the catalog. Still, Grizelda doesn't envy her brother, Randy Scouse Git.
2. Suspected of having political ties to the deposed king, Grizelda is hauled away by the police, but when pixies riding on rats rescue her and take her to their underground world she wonders if she wasn't better off in the hands of the police, since the underground is inhabited by communist goblins.
3. Half bear, half video game princess, Grizelda is torn between her loyalty to pixilated fantasy worlds and her love of scaring campers in national parks.
4. Sick to death of all the "wicked witch" jokes, sixteen-year-old Grizelda Smitts decides she might as well take up witchcraft--and finds that she's surprisingly good at it.
5. When Grizelda sets off to make her fortune in the bawdy-houses of London's East side, she gets kidnapped by a mad alchemist. Can she escape before he gilds her?
6. Grizelda is a 'pillow angel'--a child who cannot move, speak, or hear and must be fed via tube. However, she does think, and in her mind she's a pole dancer married to NASCAR hunk Ellis Whitney--who one day appears at her house to free her from her family.
Dear Evil Editor:
I am seeking representation for Grizelda, a young adult fantasy novel.
Deposing the king was supposed to make things better for the people of Corvain. But eleven years later the republican government is becoming more and more like the old monarchy. [Great, yet another Bush administration allegory.] When the police drag Grizelda, a seamstress, away in the middle of the night on suspicion of royalist ties, she expects a death sentence.
Instead she is rescued by a group of rat-riding pixies who help her seek asylum in the world beneath the capitol city. It is a complex world of sewers, abandoned mines that show signs of an ancient catastrophe, and a city inhabited by goblins that are … decidedly Communist. [The Rat-riding pixies are your hook. Can you move them closer to the top? Say, I am seeking representation for Rat-riding Pixies and the Commie Goblins . . . ] They very reluctantly allow her to live with them, but almost immediately she becomes a political tool in their next election. [I see this as a series. This one would be Rat-riding Pixies and the Republican Sewer Dwellers, to be followed by Rat-riding Pixies and the Eco-anarchists, Rat-riding Pixies and the Spotted Hyena Gynecocracy, and Rat-riding Pixies and the Thalassocratic Groupuscule.] [ It's a series designed to teach teens about politics without them realizing it.]
As her relationship with the goblins deteriorates, she becomes involved with a revolutionary group whose alleged goal is to return Corvain to the original ideals of the republic. The missions she goes on become increasingly dangerous and morally ambiguous. [She goes on missions? She just got there. And she's a seamstress. Did they send Betsy Ross to infiltrate the British army?] When one of the revolutionaries discovers that the charges against her of royalist ties are true, she is in even more danger than she was in the hands of the police. [She expected a death sentence from the police. Can you be in more danger than that?]
Grizelda is complete at 70,000 words. I have enclosed a SASE for your convenience. I look forward to hearing from you.
The police were going to kill Grizelda for having royalist ties, and when the revolutionaries find she has royalist ties she's in even more danger. Which leads me to ask whom the revolutionaries are revolting against. They seem to have the same ideology as the authorities when it comes to royalists.
Things were bad under the monarchy, they're bad under the republic, the communists don't seem so hot, the revolutionaries do worse than kill you if you have royalist ties . . . who are the good guys?
Can you make it more clear what Grizelda wants to accomplish? Is she a leaf being blown in the wind, or does she lead the good guys to victory?
The opening (or at least what was once the opening) may be read here.