Sunday, September 28, 2008

Talking Dog 6

"Here's another one that gives no title or genre, nothing about the plot or characters, but insists it would make a great movie. And three typos in the first paragraph. Shall I throw it in the slush fire, sir?"

"Of course, you idiot," Grisham replied. "When are you gonna make a decision on your own, EE?"

"Sorry, sir. I just don't want to be held responsible if we miss the next Harry Potter."

"Screw Harry Potter. I fell asleep during every Potter movie. Find me the next Marley and Me. Or how about a memoir from Dogbert?

"I'll see what I can do," EE said.

"Man, I could go for a BLT right now."

"You eat lettuce and tomato?"

"Of course not. I'm talking about a bacon/liver/turkey." Grisham took off his glasses and cleaned them on his shirt. "You know it's kind of funny," he said. "All these babes being in love with Evil Editor. And not one of them realizes I write all the blog posts. Hell, I also do all the book editing, and I'm even "anonymous."

"You're not the only anonymous," EE said.

"I'm the only one who ever submits anything funny," Grisham retorted. "And I still haven't figured out what I need you for. A writing blog written by a dog would bring in a much bigger audience than one written by a . . . donut fetcher. If your love-starved minions met us, every one of them would choose me over you. I'm shutting down Evil Editor and starting a blog called Grisham the Gossip Hound. I'll dish dirt on celebs. Cute dogs and pathetic loser celebs. Who can resist that?"

"But what about--"

"You? You'll be my first celeb. And you can still fetch me donuts."

--Evil Editor

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Searching, as I do each and every tidbit that you post, for the grain of truth lurking beneath your fiction, I was struck by the possibility that you may have named your personna, as did Indiana Jones, in honor of the family dog!?

Robin S. said...

If your love-starved minions met us, every one of them would choose me over you.

Well...maybe.

Kiersten said...

Dog as master...great take, EE. But this blog is way better than any of the celebrity gossip ones.

Not that I would know...

Dangit.

WouldBe said...

Hey, EE. Wasn't this supposed to be fictional?

--Bill H.

Sarah Laurenson said...

Aw, poor EE - just another dog slave. Actually this would be more believable if Grisham were a cat. That's more the attitude I read here. Though some dogs could pull this off.

Dave F. said...

Aha! You remembered where you put your supply of Maui-Wowie, I see!

;) Lots of fun.

Whirlochre said...

And I thought symbiosis was a disease of the liver...

Anonymous said...

And I thought symbiosis was a disease of the liver...

Don't know about that, but I'm pretty sure syphillis is a disease of the lover...