Evil Editor through History 1

Frankenevil

"I--"

"Already I'm bored."

"--am by birth a Genevese;--"

"Do we care where you were born when you are still just an 'I'?"

"--and my family is one of the most distinguished of that republic."

"Geneva is a republic?"

"My ancestors had been for many years counselors and syndics--"

"Gott helfen, she's making me open my thesaurus on the second sentence. Who did you say you were, sweetheart?"

"Mary Shelley."

"Any relation to--"

"Yes. Husband."

"Oye, oye, oye. Does he have any projects--"

"No! Now back to my story. It's a modern Prometheus, you see--"

"Percy and I go way back--"

"I don't think so. We're talking about *my* book now. It is a story of science gone wrong, but really it's--"

"I assumed this was a novel of manners or a romance."

"There is an aspect of romance, but--"

"I'm telling you right now, emphasize that aspect until there is nothing else...and get Percy to co-author it, top-billing."

"This is my story--"

"Sweetie..."

"This is non-negotiable."

"Well, if it has a science aspect, then use a male nom de'plume, at least, or publish anonymously, if you want to be taken seriously. You do want to be taken seriously, right?"

"Like now? Sir, you are a blasted tree; the bolt has entered your soul; and you should survive to exhibit what you shall soon cease to be--a miserable spectacle of wrecked humanity, pitiable to others and intolerable to yourself."

"Now, you're talking, sweetie. Did Percy write that for you?"

--Bill H.