Sunday, July 05, 2009

Pope Interview 11

A rose—who cares what kind of rose; a rose is a rose is a rose and that’s pretty uplifting, just like toothpaste squirted on a sultry mirror and smeared there like Crisco on a car window like this guy I heard on Car Talk just the other day who said he pranked somebody’s car by stuffing a ton of teabags in the window—yeah, a rose by any other name—yes, name, that’s what I’m getting to because you’re all so fixated on names when a rose by any other name would smell—no, I do not smell, that’s probably the guy next to you, the one with the hat on steroids—would smell as sweet and I know I’m quoting Shakespeare, not the Bible, but sometimes you can’t think of any appropriate verses—what’s that about the Books of the Law and stoning—no need for that, I can assure you; as I was saying, my name is hardly indicative of the sort of person I am , just like albino blackbirds use bad hairspray, so being called evil doesn’t mean I crush dreams any more than being called cardinal means you’re red—no, not redneck, red—no, not Communist and don’t worry, I’m not either—and have wings—yes, I know you’re mad about me editing that book, but I donated all—Annanias and Saphira?—ok, some—ok, thought about donating some of the money to charity, so surely you can let bygones be bygones and give me a chance, because we’ve all got some seedy things in the past, like names, and you know if you give me a chance I’ll change my name to something decent like Innocent.

--_*Rachel*_

7 comments:

Dave F. said...

A one sentence insight into lunacy. WOW.

150 said...

Hey, I heard that episode of Car Talk.

_*Rachel*_ said...

It was on right before Thistle and Shamrock; I don't normally listen.

I would never do that to somebody's car.

Anonymous said...

This was very nice - I liked the way it seemed pointless until it got to a point. Cool.

vkw

Steve said...

That is, in a perverse way, a thing of beauty.

Except I never saw EE as an Innocent, somehow.

WouldBe said...

Pope Innocent Editor?...nah.

Kathleen said...

very funny & well-done!