With a YAWN, Evil Editor swept a BASSINE-bristle brush down the FRONT of his unique LATEEN-shaped cloak. A quick CHECK in the mirror prompted an approving LABIONASAL resonance. "Mmmmm, this DESIRABLE Goranov Vijenac award for Croatian literature is a much NIFTIER EMBLAZONMENT for my garment than that LOUTISH Bulwer-Lytton medal," he mused. His paper on the Balkan linguistic PHYLUM, a field of study hardly noted for OVEREXPOSURE, had brought the honor from the Dubrovnik Institute of DIGLOTTIC Literature, and invigorated his campaign to achieve the renown he richly deserved, a process previously characterized by much FALTERING. But what if his clandestine use of material from a philological text he'd been sent to edit became known? Momentarily seized with an uncharacteristic sense of guilt, he decided to review the purloined material. Rather than a manuscript, the damned fool had sent a BIBLIOFILM. The made-in-China reader Evil Editor found for it had generated PERIODIC reports of ELECTROCUTION, but what the hell, it was cheap. One passage had elicited particular praise for its masterful translation: "THE OFFICIAL CONGESTS A COMPLAINT WITHIN THE RINGED JOURNAL." Though just as incomprehensible in Croatian, that achievement alone resulted in him being proclaimed a veritable SUPERSAINT among linguists by a whole PARADE of academics. With that memory, his customary megalomania returned. "So what if I'm charged with plagiarism?" he crowed. "What are they going to do, issue a bill of ATTAINDER? Me? Evil Editor? Haahaa! Bipolar, hell! I'm UNIPOLAR, and proud of it!"
--Paul Penna
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3 comments:
You make EE scary. And I didn't know unipolar was a word.
Indent! My tiny brain nearly popped halfway through this for lack of white space, which would have been a pity. It was fun. But indent!
You're absolutely right, but that's what happens when you stay up until 2AM and your brain's gotten so frazzled you can't take it anymore.
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