Seemed like I didn't have a lot of choice. I picked up the box and carried it into the house and set it on the coffee table. Then I got out the bottle of gin and fixed myself a martini. I turned off the T.V. and sat in the brown leather arm chair my little sister got me for Christmas before we stopped speaking.
Me and the baby and the gin, we just sat there until the phone rang. It was Dave, checking up on me. Dave keeps calling me even though I never pay him any attention. I was glad for it, this time.
"I've got a baby," I told him. He started to splutter but I cut him off. "No, I didn't have a baby, you idiot, it just appeared."
He asked what happened and when I told him it was still in the box he told me he was on his way over. He thought I should feel bad but hell, it wasn't my baby. And no one with any sense would leave a baby with me. I washed up my glass and put everything away and then I sat and waited. That baby just stared right up at me, as if it wasn't particularly bothered about lying in a box in some stranger's house.
--Sylvia
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8 comments:
I like this - the dry sense of humor, the off handed way of saying something big happened but the narrator is treating in as though it were just another thing.
I like this. What's the story?
Yes, I like this too. It's so good, it's almost a pity it wasn't in for a continuation. I can see the scene so clearly, the baby looking up out of the box.
This is very well written, Sylvia. Such a big moment, and dealt with so matter-of-factly. I would love to read more!
I'm impressed and can't think of anything I'd change. I especially liked the way the little sister was dropped in.
That's a nice bit. Leaves the reader thinking about lots.
This one has a great voice, it sets the situation up nicely. I would read more!
Argh - sorry for the late response. This is an excerpt from a short story that I'm revising at the moment. I might put forward the beginning for a continuation, although the first draft of it has been on this site before (in a writing exercise).
I was worried the sister looked really blatant, pulled out like this. She only gets two mentions in the story (the point is mainly to understand that the narrator is cut off from friends and family).
Thanks for the positive comments and I'm sorry I'm so late to the party!
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