EE, Gift Counselor 4

“Sometimes it just doesn’t work out, does it?”

I blink. “Huh?’

“Sometimes,” he opined, “you have to part. Divorce, if you like.”

“Divorce?”

He slapped his hand down on the table. “Money, you dolt. How much do you have to spend and where’s my fee anyway?”

“Oh.” I pulled a folded-up envelope out of my pocket and slid it over to him. “So, I still need to buy for all my aunts and uncles. I’ve got…” I counted on my fingers. “Two pairs on Mom’s side, three on Dad’s, and a family friend type of aunt and uncle.”

“Novel Deviations. That’s—”

“$5 each.”

“Yes, but you have to buy the whole set.”

I scribbled that down in my notebook. “OK, Mom’s side likes literature well enough. But everyone else is pretty redneck.”

He glanced around, all shifty-eyed. “Do you have much left to spend? Minus my fee?”

“A couple hundred, maybe? Depending on whether or not I want college tuition next fall.”

“College schmollege. Intern instead. So,” and he lowered his voice, “an old friend left me these. Secondhand, but she took good care of them.”

He pushed one across the desk to me, and I peered at it. “A cluegun?”

He was looking at me, googly-eyed. “Divorce with your money. You know it to be true.”

“Um, yeah. But I need to make sure the gun works, first.”

“No, don’t point that—!”

“——————————”

--_*rachel*_